Inspiring speech by Al Pacino (Any Given Sunday)

30 06 2009



What are YOU gonna do?

What are YOU gonna do?











I don’t know what to say, really.

3 minutes…to the biggest battle of our professional lives…all comes down to today.

And either, we heal, as a team, or we’re gonna crumble…

Inch by inch, play by play…til we’re finished.

We’re in hell right now gentlemen…believe me.

And…we can stay here, get the crap kicked out of us…

Or…we can fight our way back…into the light…we can climb outta hell…

One inch at a time.


Now, I cant do it for you…Im too old.

I look around, and see these young faces…and I think…

I mean, I’ve made every wrong choice a middle-aged man can make…

Lately, I can’t even stand the face I see in the mirror…

You know, when you get old in life, things get taken from you…

I mean… that’s part of life…

BUT, you only learn that, when you start losing stuff…

And you find out, life is a game of inches.

And so is football…


Because, in either game, life or football, the margin for error is so small,

I mean, one half a step too late, or too early, and you don’t quite make it,

One half second too slow, too fast, you don’t quite catch it,

The inches we need are everywhere around us…

They’re in every break of the game, every minute, every second.

On this team, we fight for that inch.

On this team, WE tear ourselves and everyone else around us, to pieces for that inch…

WE claw with our fingernails for that inch…

Because WE know, when WE add up all those inches,

Thats gonna make the difference, between winning and losing!

Between living and dying!


I’ll tell you this:

In any fight, its the guy who’s willing to die, who’s gonna win that inch…

And I know, if I’m gonna have any life anymore…

It’s because I’m still willing to fight and die for that inch…

Because, that’s what living is!

The six inches in front of your face!!!

Now, I can’t make you do it, you gotta look at the guy next to you, look into his eyes!

I think you’re gonna see a guy, who will go that inch with you…

You’re gonna see a guy, who will sacrifice himself, for this team,

Because he knows, when it comes down to it, you’re gonna do the same for him.

Thats a team, gentlemen…and, either we heal, NOW, as a team, or we will die… as individuals.

Thats it, guys… thats all it is.


What are you gonna do?

-Al Pacino (Any given Sunday)


Man up, and find your N.U.T.s.

20 06 2009

Loved this article on Art of Manliness website. I took a couple of hours today to define my N.U.T.s and found it a valuable exercise – it makes you think about what’s important to you – and challenges you to align your actions and person to those values! This is particularly for men – but can apply just as easily to women (maybe with some changes on emphasis). Men today have lost the skills and backbone to be leaders, to stand up for themselves and not jsut run with the crowd and follow their every whim. This world and this generation in particular, needs men of principle. You’ll never be able to truly lead others, unless you can first lead yourself.

Are you prepared to man up, and step up to the plate?




One of the most important challenges facing every good man who wants to be better is to know exactly what he’s committed to. Without a clear understanding of what is acceptable and what is not, a man is untethered, and likely to find himself down a path of compromise, resentment and despair. So, what’s a better man to do? Find his N.U.T.s and maintain a firm grasp.

N.U.T.s are your Non-negotiable, Unalterable Terms. N.U.T.s are the things you’re committed to, the things that matter more than anything else: your kids, your career, your primary relationships, yourself, your purpose, your spiritual practice, your hobbies, your integrity, your morals and your psychological well-being.

N.U.T.s are the boundaries that define you as man, those things which, if repeatedly compromised, will gradually—but assuredly—turn you into a pissed-off, resentful man who will likely blame others—especially your wife—for your unhappiness.

Your N.U.T.s are uniquely yours. They reflect who you are as a man and the man you want to be. Compromise your N.U.T.s, and you’ll compromise yourself. Compromise yourself too often, and you’ll become an extremely unhappy man, husband and father.

Sample N.U.T.s

Here’s a short list of Non-negotiable, Unalterable Terms provided by the men of our BetterMen Community. These will give you an idea of the N.U.T.s which men, like you, have developed for themselves in their efforts to be the men they’ve always wanted to be.

I say what I want.

Compassion for my family trumps my need to be right.

I replace doubt with acts of faith.

I am a risk taker.

I devote at least three hours a week to my writing.

I live in accordance with my faith.

I do not ask for permission.

Fear does not keep me from taking risks.

I do not indulge my addictions.

I am a man of my word—period!

I take my problems to men, not to women.

I do not show anger to my elderly mother.

I do not tolerate other’s attempts to belittle me.

When name-calling begins, the discussion is over.

I spend time with other men.

I have my own private office/space some place in my house.

I exercise regularly.

I ask for help when I’m not being the man I want to be.

I speak my mind in spite of my fear of confrontation.

I honor my daily spiritual practice.

I welcome feedback.

I only apologize when it’s appropriate, not simply to please others.

I do not hide out at work just to avoid issues at home.

I choose which of my friendships to maintain.

I do not sell out who I am to placate others.

I share my men’s work with the men in my life.

I do as I see fit.

This list is here simply to inspire you. Maybe some of these N.U.T.s resonate with you. If so, use them and make them your own.

Can you imagine the transformation in your life and relationships if you were this clear about your terms? Can you see how much easier it would be for you make decisions? Do you understand how you owning your N.U.T.s makes it so much easier for those around you to rely upon you and respect you?

Finding Your N.U.T.s

Understanding the importance of finding and never compromising your N.U.T.s—your Non-negotiable, Unalterable Terms—is the most important thing you, as a man, will do. Once you find your N.U.T.s, never forget them and never compromise them.

Some men find their N.U.T.s over time, while others sit down and make a list. Either way, here are some of the questions you’ll want to ask yourself:

  • What’s most important to me in life?
  • Are there activities I used to do for fun that I no longer do? Is someone interfering and am I resentful because of it?
  • Are there valuable friendships with men I’ve let slip away?
  • Where am I currently having problems (unhappy, frustrated, sad, angry, resentful) in my life, and did compromising myself—and what’s important to me—contribute to my feelings and/or the situation?
  • What dreams have I abandoned?
  • If I’m going to be the man I want to be, what will I have to do differently?

Today’s Task: Find Your N.U.T.s

Carve out a good chunk of time. Have privacy. No distractions. Breathe for a couple of minutes like this: count to seven in, hold for seven, count to seven out. Do it a few times. Feel yourself relaxing and connecting to this important moment.

Take the list of N.U.T.s offered above and identify candidates that suit you.

Then methodically answer the six questions above. Don’t rush it. This is your life. If you’re going to short-change this process, how committed are you, really, to becoming a better man? Take your time. Compile your first draft of N.U.T.s.

This may be today’s task, but for many men, it’s a lifetime commitment. The more work we put into defining our N.U.T.s, the happier and more successful we’ll be. And as we mature, we change. As we change, so must some of our N.U.T.s. This list you create today will be something you’ll want to revisit periodically.

For this first go around, expect to come back to it a few times over the course of the next month. Let your N.U.T.s sink in. Run them by a man or men you respect. Get challenged. See what you’re made of. See how committed you truly are to these new N.U.T.s.

Then, live them and keep asking for help.

If Today Was Your Last Day

14 06 2009
If today was your last day...

If today was your last day...

Today I head this new song by Nickelback, from their Dark Horse album. The lyrics may not be the most original, the message really struck a chord with me. We all know what it’s like to procrastinate (some of us more than others!); the truth is that we can put off doing the things that make our life matter – to us, and to others.

The songs says “the hands of time are never on your side” – this is so true. What important thing(s) could you do today that you’ve been putting off? What would you actually do if today was your last day?

Lyrics to the song are below. Let it stir you into action! Change is not comfortable but if we don’t grow, we go backwards and our life actually gets SMALLER. Think about it – and DO.


Watch the music video here:

If Today Was Your Last Day lyrics
Songwriters: Kroeger, Chad

My best friend gave me the best advice
He said each day’s a gift and not a given right
Leave no stone unturned, leave your fears behind
And try to take the path less traveled by
That first step you take is the longest stride

If today was your last day and tomorrow was too late
Could you say goodbye to yesterday?
Would you live each moment like your last
Leave old pictures in the past?
Donate every dime you had, if today was your last day?
What if, what if, if today was your last day?

Against the grain should be a way of life
What’s worth the price is always worth the fight
Every second counts ’cause there’s no second try
So live like you’re never living twice
Don’t take the free ride in your own life

If today was your last day and tomorrow was too late
Could you say goodbye to yesterday?
Would you live each moment like your last?
Leave old pictures in the past?
Donate every dime you had?

And would you call those friends you never see?
Reminisce old memories?
Would you forgive your enemies?
And would you find that one you’re dreaming of?
Swear up and down to God above
That you’d finally fall in love if today was your last day?

If today was your last day
Would you make your mark by mending a broken heart?
You know it’s never too late to shoot for the stars
Regardless of who you are

So do whatever it takes
‘Cause you can’t rewind a moment in this life
Let nothing stand in your way
‘Cause the hands of time are never on your side

If today was your last day and tomorrow was too late
Could you say goodbye to yesterday?
Would you live each moment like your last?
Leave old pictures in the past?
Donate every dime you had?

And would you call those friends you never see?
Reminisce old memories?
Would you forgive your enemies?
And would you find that one you’re dreaming of
Swear up and down to God above
That you’d finally fall in love if today was your last day?